Blog...

Darn, has been quite some time since I last updated..

seems like sudah berkarat..

will update when something happens..

LOL

PPStreaming

Yup. It had to happen. I'll happily rant about anything I want.

PPS, or otherwise known as PPstreaming, is a chinese developed software meant to stream videos. Streaming is a process of rapidly getting data and playing back, almost instantaneously. Data only flows through the computer, and does not occupy any disk space.

Initially, the software is used in china (duh!). The internet speed there is actually way faster than what we have here, and so, by streaming, it is a logical idea too, since not many people likes to download movies. And from what I can tell, chinese can stream movies without affecting their download speeds, as they have a much better bandwidth.

Now here lies the problem. Some smart ass chinese who came here to study, tried to PPstream in Malaysia, but failed, as the speeds were atrocious. I bet he/she told some Malaysian that streaming is the future and bla bla bla.

Thing is though, streaming is good, but please do it in the confines of your own house, not in a shared house, or a hostel. The whole house's net will crawl, and people will hate you, your children, grandchilden and 3 generations after that. It is downright selfish to stream in a shared house, as PPstream can really suck the bandwidth. I've seen, in a house equipped with a 2MB/s Streamyx line, PPstream can use up to 1.8MB/s. That is what we all call a leeching program, and not even torrents can achieve such speeds. Sure, you benefit by enjoying your movie, and not wasting any hard drive space, but at what cost?

Conclusion? Stop streaming and get a life. I don't mind people downloading torrents, but PPstream is just way too stingy. To all PPstreamers, you know who you are.

Why I hate Facebook

- Fukken apps that clogs up the whole wall. And you can't see the proper posts by HUMANS !
- Every reply I get, an email comes in. I have to cleat >500 Facebook emails weekly. Ya, I can deactivate it, but how the hell am I going to know when there's an update? Facebook, if you're seeing this, LEARN TO FUKKEN CONTROL IT !!
- Damn Web2.0 coding that screws up in Chrome.
- Flash games that makes systems hang ( Restaurant City, Pet Society etc)

Will add more when "the mood" comes

Why???

Why is life so damn unfair?

Look at this. Me and a few of my friends are carfags. Yes, we do love cars. And like some of them, I don't own a car. Look around at Westlake. All the non-carfags are happily driving their godforsaken MeeVees all over the place. Those are people who drive from point A to point B. But for a carfag, we don't mind driving from point A to point B to point C and back to point A just to enjoy the car. Yes, driving for us is where we release our stress. But what happens if we don't have one? How to release our stress? Fap? Online? Cycle?

And then another one of my friend mentioned that, to be a good driver, tons of experience is needed. And practice as much as you when while you're here. Fine by me, but then, where's my so-called car for me to practice?? Flaws everywhere..

I'm not the only one, I know. my friend, who was promised a car, and now can't get it till next year, is feeling the same as me right now. what the heck, he has a higher chance of getting a ride when compared to me.

but then, life is unfair after all. so from that conclusion, i think my chances of getting a car here is pretty slim.. or maybe i should just give up.. sometimes i just couldnt be fukken bothered.. but at times like this..ranting out is my only way..but for how long can i rant on like this before i go insane??

How to be an a$$ behind the wheel pt2

4. Know your car. There's no point of you shifting early in hopes of 1. overtaking and 2. saving petrol. For 1, you need to see ur car's specification sheet to see where the maximum power comes in. There's no point in shifting early before the power kicks in, nor is there a point in shifting AFTER the power kicks in. If and when possible, just press the accelerator when you feel like overtaking. Don't bother about FC or what not. No one really does bother about that anyway. And if you want to save petrol, call a cab, or take a bus. Don't drive lah ! For what you want to drive AND save petrol? It just won't work.

5. Driving a big car, let's say AT LEAST a Waja sized sedan, should allow you to flash other drivers out of your way. Let's say you're driving on the highway in the center lane, then there's this b@$t@rd in front of you that is going so damn slow. Flash your Highbeam to push him out of the way. No need to overtake from the left or right. Just flash him. Chances are, he will move aside. If not, tailgate him. Be very careful as you tailgate him, as he might floor the brakes and you can guess what will happen. I take no responsibilities whatsoever.

Part 1-3

http://my-life-starts-here.blogspot.com/2009/08/how-to-be-a-behind-wheel.html

How to be an a$$ behind the wheel

First and foremost, I do not condone being an ass behind the wheel. You are responsible for all of your own actions, not me. And here goes.

1. See the damn Kancil/Kelisa/Saga in front of you hogging the right hand lane? Tailgate it as close as possible. Keep your revs up, and maintain your distance with the nut in front. Flash your lights if possible to get him/her out of your way. Do note however, that this works better if you drive at least a 3-Series or a C-Class. Anything lower means you will need to work much harder.

2. Constantly shift your gears at 5000-6000rpm. Well, if you drive a diesel, max out at 4000rpm. For autos, just press the accelerator. Don't complain to me about wasting petrol, because, if you want to save, you can take the bus/taxi. Do more in small residential areas, just for the heck of it. Those with 3 cylinder engines (Kancil/Viva) need not apply. The noise is horrible. Those with silky smooth straight six or straight 4 should fare better.

3. Defeat the guy next to you at the traffic light. It doesn't matter what he/she drives, just press the accelerator hard when the light turns green. Watch his face, if not, be prepared to get smoked. Would be better if you can smoke those darn Wiralutions or Wajalutions.

Will add more if I can think of more.

2 Horny Dwarfs

A not very well off dwarf wins the $121 million state lottery and he decides to splash out. He calls his best friend (another dwarf) and they take the first flight down to Vegas.

Throwing a hundred thousand around on the crap tables, they soon gather a few admirers, in particular, two gorgeous, mini-skirted girls of easy virtue. The four of them soon retire to the 2-bedroom penthouse suite for a night of champagne, cocaine and general debauchery.

Unfortunately, despite the charms of his new lady friend, the first dwarf, is unable to get a hard-on. His depression is made worse by the fact that, from the next room, he hears his little friend shouting out cries of:

"Here I come again ...ONE, TWO, THREE...UUH!" and the squeaking of bed-springs all night long.

In the morning, once the girls have gone, the second dwarf asks the first:

"How did it go?"

The first mutters:

"It was so embarrassing. I just couldn't get it up."

The second dwarf shook his head:

"You think that's embarrassing? I couldn't even get on the f***ing bed!"

Food !!

wow..has been almost a month since I last updated my blog..i guess people would think I'm dead !!

Anyway, here are some updates on some -> food !!
A friend of mine brought me out for lunch the other day at 36 Stall in Kampar..had this chicken porridge..excellent...
Chicken...yum yum..
Even the porridge is excellent...

Some lame jokes.

Two pretzels were walking down the street.
They were a-salted.

A guy walks into a bar
His alcohol dependency is ruining his family

a baby seal walks into a club...

2 tampons walking down the street. What do they say to each other?
Nothing. They're both stuck up cunts.

I got this awesome knock-knock joke...you start.
Try it, you'll be surprised the number of people who fall for it.

Two fish are in a tank. One looks at the other and says, "I don't know how to drive this thing."

a man walks into a bar.... Ouch.

a pirate bursts into a bar with a ships wheel protruding from his pants.
he says: ARRRRRRRRRRR Its driving ME NUTS!

what did one new zealand statue say to the other?
"statchoo bro"

why does a chicken coup have 2 doors?
if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken sedan.
(rim shot)

The reason computer chips are so small is computers don't eat much

what's a pirate's favorite part of the human anatomy
The ARRRRRRRRRRReola

I just saw a comedian walking down the street, but he was really Harry Potter's godfather.


Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." The second one says, "No soap, radio?"

Three bank robbers are running from the police and run into a potato factory. They each hide in a potato sack. The police arrive and see the bags are moving.
The police kick the first potato sack and the first robber says, "Meow Meow"
Police say, "Oh its just a cat"
They kick the second potato sack and the second robber says, "Bow Wow!"
Police say, "Oh it's just a dog"
They kick the third potato sack and the third robber says, "Potato, Potato!"

So I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?". He said "How flexible are you?". I said "I can't make Tuesdays".

what did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog?
gee we really do taste like chicken

A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."

Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

A guy is asleep on his couch
He hears a knock on the door, and gets up to answer it.
He looks down, and sees a snail. Pissed that this snail woke him up, he picks up the snail, and throws it.
There's another knock on the door. The man answers it, and it's the snail who says "What the hell was that all about?"

Did you hear about the two antenna that got married?
The wedding was okay, but the reception was Amazing.

Retard goes to ice cream van and asks driver "i'll have two ice creams" van driver say's "what flavour topping would you like?" Retard says "dont matter im gonna drop them anyway"

Nigger walks into a bar with a duck under his arm, the Bartender says "hey you can't have that thing in here" and the duck says "I tried to tell him that, the dumb nigger wouldn't listen"

Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new baby son.
The doctor walks in and Michael asks: "Doctor, how long before we can have sex?"
The doctor replies, "I'd wait until he's at least 14

Why can't Hellen Keller drive?
She's a woman.

What's the difference between a Priest and acne?
Acne comes on a kid's face after he turns 13.

what's the difference between jam and marmalade???
i can't marmalade my cock up your ass.
where does the king keep his armies?
In his sleevies

2 muffins in an oven
one says to the other
"OMG WHERE IN AN OVEN!"
the other turns around and says
"OMG A TALKING MUFFIN!"

What's green and red and goes 1000 mph?
A frog in a blender.

why does the virgin mary look sad?
she wanted a girl

A man says to his doctor, "Doc, I cant stop singing "She's A Lady."
The doctor replies, "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome to me."
The man says, "Is it common?"
The doctor replies, "It's not unusual."

A guy gets shipwrecked. When he wakes up, he's on a beach. The sand is dark red. He can't believe it. The sky is dark red. He walks around a bit and sees there is dark red grass, dark red birds and dark red fruit on the dark red trees. He's shocked when he finds that his skin is starting to turn dark red too.
"Oh no!!" he says. "I think I've been marooned!!"

guy's at the hospital, the doctor says
"I have good news and bad news"
guy- "gimme the bad news"
doctor- "you have three days left to live"
guy - " what the hell is the good news?!"
doctor - "we're naming the disease after you"

What goes 99-clump. 99-clump?
A centipede with a wooden leg.

there's a family of tomatoes walking down the street, a mama tomato, a papa tomato and a baby tomato, and the baby tomato starts to lag behind and papa tomato gets really angry, so he squishes him and says "ketchup."

A thief who stole a calendar got.....
twelve months.
A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became....
a hardened criminal.
The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was.....
on shaky ground.
A dentist and a manicurist fought.....
tooth and nail.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger....
Then it hit me.
Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was....
resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He's all right now.
The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a.....
little behind in his work.
The dwarf fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a.....
small medium at large.

Why don't you put a baby in the blender head first?
Because you can't see his expression on the way down.

Streamyx in Kampar